How do you decide to do something or to go to something? Is it based on impulse or is it something you think about before deciding?
Earlier this year I started listening to podcasts and one of them was the podcasts by The Minimalists. (Side note: Here are some other podcasts I recommend. Although they have changed since.) Sometimes I agree with what they are saying, or I disagree, or I make it work for my current situation. But there is one thing that changed my perspective. On one of the podcasts, Joshua Fields Milburn (one half of The Minimalists) said that if something is not a hell yes then it’s a no. Mind. Blown.
Let me give you a little bit of context. The guys were talking about commitments and items and how to determine if they actually wanted or like them. And Josh said that if it’s not an immediate hell yes then it’s a no. This can easily be applied to when your friends invite you out or when you have too much on your plate and you need to figure out what to cut back on.
When I initially heard this, I was still in the sorority and I immediately tried it. I asked myself if I would still be involved if I were given the option. My response was something along the lines of obligation and duty. But not because I was really happy with doing it anymore. I learned that we are the best advocates for something that we do not want to do. We constantly convince ourselves that we should be doing something, rather than letting our initial instinct or reaction guide us in our decision making.
I had to learn how to say no and step down because of my health (and sanity). It wasn’t easy, but listening to your instincts is the best way to practice self care. We often get the idea that self-care has to be grand. But more often than not, it’s the little things that you do to make your day and life better.
Try practicing listening to your initial reaction. Maybe it will help you decide what to do or what to let go of. It might even change your life.